It Takes a Village to Raise a Child
Well, I started this post in May but am just now getting around to finishing it. Oops! Having 2 really does cut down on my free time! :)
There is a famous African proverb that says, "It takes a village to raise a child". I find this saying to be true, and sad; sad because all of our family lives far away. However, we have been so incredibly blessed with all of the help we received when Isaac was born.
When I had Kayla, I didn't think I wanted help at the beginning. I wanted us to be alone, let us figure out our child, let us learn how to parent and not have other people give us advice... we wanted to learn for ourselves. However, I did receive a lot of help last time, and it was SO BENEFICIAL. This time around, I knew I wanted help. Not so much help with the baby, but help with Kayla. So... we lined up visits from both of our parents!!
My parents planned to drive out to Michigan for Easter weekend and my mom was staying for 2 weeks. That meant she'd be here a week before and a week after my due date. Of course, the baby would come whenever he/she was ready... but we thought it would be most likely to come during that time. Of course, Isaac came 11 days early! But my mom bought a plane ticket and was here the next day! She was able to stay with Kayla our 2nd night in the hospital, and was then in town for almost 3 weeks to help out. She went grocery shopping, she made meals, she took care of Kayla, she helped me out with household chores, etc. It was an incredible blessing to have her here to help.
My dad came in town for Easter and then was back in town to drive her home, and then I had my first 4 days home alone with the 2 kids. It went much better than I'd expected. Then, my in-laws came in town for a long weekend and my mother-in-law stayed for 2 weeks. So by the time Isaac was 6 weeks old, I'd spent only 4 days alone with the 2! What an incredible blessing! My MIL did shopping, cooking, playing with Kayla, making her dresses, helping with household chores, etc! With both mom's, I was able to truly focus all of my attention on Isaac, bond with him, learn about him and enjoy him.... and I was able to let them take over most of the "parenting" of Kayla. Of course I still spent time with her, still played with her, etc.... but I was able to do that when Isaac was sleeping instead of trying to juggle nursing/cuddling him and dealing with her. I realized that at some point that would be necessary, however, it was nice to postpone reality for 6 weeks! By that time, Kayla understood that I would spend time nursing Isaac and taking care of his needs, but that I also had time to take care of her and her needs. It made our transition SO MUCH EASIER than I'd expected. I can't thank my mom and my MIL enough for their sacrifices they made to help us out.
Times like these make me sad that we don't have family in town. I suppose if they were in town, they wouldn't have spent a few weeks at a time helping us out! But it was so nice to have family support. And even though they live far away, they made huge efforts to help us out in our time of transition, and I will be forever grateful to them for making the first 6 weeks of having 2 children so enjoyable and so stress-free, and for helping make the transition of me being alone with the 2 so easy. That time I was able to spend bonding with Isaac was precious and I am so thankful that I had help so that I was able to do that.